Like most activities in our lives, help falls into the WHY, WHAT, and HOW scenario. Indeed, we first need to have a good reason to help someone. Then, we typically try to figure out the format of such help. And the last part is the specific sequence of tasks we are willing to perform.

But first, let’s cover the whole idea of asking if you can help someone. If you do, you are caring, confident, and have guts. Humans, just like any other beings, are quite selfish. The sheer idea that you might go out of your way to help someone is commendable.

Now let’s get to the reasons WHY we might help someone.

Here is a list of a few good ones:

  • Care about that person
  • Care about a cause or a mission
  • Paying it forward (my favorite, now that I am 55, and don’t have sky-high aspirations myself)

Expecting a favor in return probably ranks as a neutral reason, because, while being selfish, we are still offering to be the first to act (help).

Some of the wrong reasons to be helping someone are:

  • We can’t say “no”
  • It is a part of an evil scheme

In terms of WHAT, Jesus said it best. Teaching how to fish beats giving them fish any day. Enabling someone to achieve their goal is both effective and rewarding. This includes:

  • Teaching or training someone
  • Introductions to experts or interested parties
  • Validation of ideas
  • Referral to useful materials or authorities
  • Emotional support

There are exceptions though, where giving someone fish is acceptable. For example, we might ask a college professor for a recommendation for a summer intern. But that is a win-win-win scenario, where the professor wins, the student/intern wins, and my company wins.

The HOW part is the one that we get wrong so often.

In response to someone asking for help we often say something like “I will keep my ear to the ground” or “let me think about it and get back to you”. These are non-starter plans to help, because they rarely result in any real action.

Real plans to help include concrete steps and milestones, such as communication, materials, meetings, follow-up, etc.

Let’s admit it – those asking for help are usually so concerned about being a burden that they don’t insist on a concrete plan of attack. Those of us, who are asked for help have the best intentions, but there is a saying about the best intentions…

In the end, though, both parties are to blame for the lack of an action plan.

Hopefully, this email puts a helpful perspective on helping others (pun intended). I am certainly willing and able to help you. Please don’t hesitate to contact me.

In other news, Massaro is currently recruiting for an Associate Consultant role. We are looking for a talented May 2026 graduate, who is eager to make a difference for our clients and learn a ton, while at it. If you know of anyone, please connect them to me.

Sincerely,

Mikhail

Mikhail Papovsky
Founder and CEO | M A S S A R O